Saturday.... scarred and happy :P

I looked in a mirror after spending most of the night on the toilet and decided to weigh myself. And sure enough, I'm at my lowest weigh ever. I'm not going to say what it is, just in case it changes from one day to the next, but I can still be happy about it. Of course, laxatives are a cheat because they essentially just rob your body of water, but i can be a little happy, can't I?

Saturday's are usually hard for me, because it's my one free day of the week and i feel like I deserve to indulge myself a little. And indulging is great, as long as it doesn't equal food. I'm so inspired after seeing the number on that scale that i wanna fast or seriously restrict all day. But no, people are always watching. So I'm just gonna try to stay under 500 cal today and keep myself busy busy busy. So so far i took a wonderfully long bath, made myself breakfast/lunch (egg white omelet with 2 mushrooms and a 20 cal cracker), read up on everyone else's blogs and watched something. Besides that I'm planning to clean, read a book i started, work out and write.

Another fun fact, I've decided to start writing again. I used to, but i stopped for a long time. Not really sure why, i just remember that it's something i used to enjoy and i think i should get back into it. Sometimes i write poetry, other times just random thoughts. Maybe I'll even gather up the courage to post some here, we'll see.

And in case anyone's wondering about the odd title, I'll explain. I'm sure most people have guess why the happy bit, but losing weight isn't the only thing I'm exited about. A friend I haven't seen in aaaagggges is flying over, and I'm going to see him tomorrow. I haven't seen him in like 4 years now, and to be honest i miss him. He's one of these guys that you can't help but love, and he was always sort of like an older brother to me. In any case, a lot has happened in his life since then and he has a daughter now. I'm just wondering how much he's changed and if he's still the same person i knew. I hope so, because i could really use a friend right now. I guess we'll just have to see.

Alright, that's it for now. Relax and enjoy life everyone. Take care!!!


Update: Ok so i just spent the whole afternoon doing the weirdest thing ever. I was really REALLy craving food, and i felt like i was going to binge.... so i ate a cup of watermellon, drank a cofee and proceeded to spend the rest of the afternoon cooking. Yup cooking.... But this is not a story with a bad ending, because I have this weird thing that i don't eat what i cook for other people. So even though the food i made was apparently really good I didn't even taste it to make sure it was edible :P. Actually i technically should have been at least tempted, because it was pasta with a cheese, creamy, mushroomy white sauce with salami in it.But nothing, i didn't even have the desire to take a bite. Maybe i inhaled enough calories through my nose to fill me up. Well, not likely because I'm still hungry but whatever. Best part of this story is all my food cravings went away and now I'm the happiest little pumpkin on the block (don't ask why pumpkin, must be because they have so many hanging around the house). So my total intake today was 250 cal max, i worked out for 45 and spent most of the afternoon on my feet. Most of all i had a really, genuinly enjoyable day.


I must admit though, that I'm not always as strong as I was then with food, particularly if I'm baking something. Sometimes when i feel a binge coming on i bake just so i can taste the batter or whatever (I never eat the finished product). But hey, i think I'm getting stronger every day so yuppie yay for me!!